Here is a list of the world’s most ridiculous laws… no wonder lawyers earn so much!
– In Victoria Australia, only a licensed electrician is allowed to change a lightbulb.
– In Victoria Australia it is forbidden to wear pink hot pants after mid-day on a Sunday.
– It England, it is illegal for a cab in the City of London to carry rabid dogs or corpses.
– It England, it is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.
– It England, it is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside down.
– In France, it is forbidden to call a pig Napoleon.
– Under the UK’s Tax Avoidance Schemes Regulations 2006, it is illegal not to tell the taxman anything you don’t want him to know, though you don’t have to tell him anything you don’t mind him knowing.
– In Alabama, it is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while driving a vehicle.
– In Ohio, it is against state law to get a fish drunk.
– Royal Navy ships that enter the Port of London must provide a barrel of rum to the Constable of the Tower of London.
– In the UK, a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants – even, if she so requests, in a policeman’s helmet.
– In Lancashire, no person is permitted after being asked to stop by a constable on the seashore to incite a dog to bark.
– In Miami, Florida, it is illegal to skateboard in a police station.
– In Indonesia, the penalty for masturbation is decapitation.
– In the UK, all men over the age of 14 must carry out two hours of longbow practice a day.
– In London, Freemen are allowed to take a flock of sheep across London Bridge without being charged a toll; they are also allowed to drive geese down Cheapside.
– In San Salvador, drunk drivers can be punished by death before a firing squad.
– In the UK, a man who feels compelled to urinate in public can do so only if he aims for his rear wheel and keeps his right hand on his vehicle.
– In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on Sundays can be jailed.
– In Kentucky, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon more than six-feet long.
– In Chester, Welshmen are banned from entering the city before sunrise and from staying after sunset.
– In the city of York, it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.
– In Boulder, Colorado, it is illegal to kill a bird within the city limits and also to “own” a pet – the town’s citizens, legally speaking, are merely “pet minders”.
– In Vermont, women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
– In London, it is illegal to flag down a taxi if you have the plague.
– In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals but is forbidden from looking directly at them during the examination; he may only see their reflection in a mirror.
– The head of any dead whale found on the British coast is legally the property of the King; the tail, on the other hand, belongs to the Queen – in case she needs the bones for her corset.
– In Eureka, Nevada, USA, it is still illegal for men with moustaches to kiss women.
– In Alexandria, Minnesota, USA, it is still illegal for a man who has garlic, onions or sardines on his breath to have sex with his wife.
– In Logan County, Colorado, USA, it is still illegal to kiss a woman while she is asleep.
– In Providence, Rhode Island, USA, it is still illegal for shop owners to sell toothpaste and toothbrushes to the same customer on a Sunday.
– In Zion, Illinois, USA, it is still illegal to offer cigars to your pets.
– In St. Louis, Missouri, USA, it is still illegal for firemen to rescue women who are still in their nightdresses.
– In Ames, Iowa, USA, it is still illegal for men to have three sips of beer while they are in bed with their wives.
– In Maryland, USA, it is still illegal for radio stations to play Randy Newman’s song ‘Short people’.
– In Oklahoma, USA, it is still illegal to make faces at a dog, a crime that could result in a prison sentence.
– In Texas, USA, criminals are still required to give their victims at least 24 hours oral or written notice giving details of the crime they are about to commit.
– In Washington, USA, it is still an offence to pretend that you have rich parents.
– In Baltimore, Maryland, USA, it is still an offence to take a lion into a cinema.
– In Tremonton, Utah, USA, it is still an offence for a woman to have sexual intercourse with a man in an ambulance. She can be charged with a misdemeanour and have her name printed in the local paper.
– In Oxford, Ohio, USA, it is still illegal for a woman to undress in front of a picture of a man.
– In Miami, Florida, USA, it is still illegal for anyone to imitate an animal.
– In Afghanistan the Taliban militia banned women from wearing white socks just in case men find them attractive. The police are also ordered windows to be painted black to stop women being seen from the outside.
– In the USA impotence is grounds for divorce in 24 states.
– In Illinois, USA, it is against the law to give a lighted cigar to a pet.
– In Iowa, USA, it is against the law to kiss for more than five minutes.
– In International Falls, Minnesota, USA, it is against the law for a dog to chase a cat up a telegraph pole and dog owners can be fined for this.
– In Kentucky, USA, it is illegal to carry and ice cream cone in your pocket.
– In Louisiana, USA, if you bite someone with your own teeth it is classed as ‘Simple assault’ but if you bite someone with your dentures it is classed as ‘aggravated assault.’
– In Massachusetts, USA, it is illegal for mourners to eat no more than three sandwiches at a wake.
– In Chico, California, USA, the law says that anybody who detonates a nuclear device within the city limits is liable to a fine of $500.
– In Lebanon any man may legally have sex with any animal just as long as it is a female.
– In Conorsville, Wisconsin, USA, it is illegal for a man to fire a gun while his wife is having an orgasm.
– In Tremonton, Utah, USA, it is illegal for a woman to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance.
– In Oblong, Illinois, it is illegal to make love while fishing or hunting on your wedding day.
– In Bahrain it is illegal for a doctor to look directly at a woman’s genitals while he is examining her although he is permitted to see their reflection in a mirror.
– In Ames, Iowa, USA, a husband may not take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with his wife.
– In Hastings, Nebraska, USA, the law says that hotel owners have to provide a clean white cotton nightshirt for each guest. Also no couples are allowed to have sex in the hotel unless they are wearing these nightshirts.
– In Willowdale, Oregon, USA, no man may curse while having sex with his wife.
– In Indonesia the punishment for masturbation is execution by decapitation.
– In Kingsville, Texas, USA, it is against the law for pigs to have sex on airport property.
– In Florida it is illegal to have sex with a porcupine.
– During World War I anyone found to be a homosexual in the French army was executed.
– Hundreds of years ago in Japan anyone who attempted to leave the country was instantly executed.
– The very first country to abolish capital punishment was Austria in 1787.
– In Wetaskiwin, Alberta, Canada, in 1917, it was illegal to tie a male horse next to a female horse.
– In San Diego, USA, hypnotism is banned by public schools.
– Chewing gum is illegal in Singapore.
– In Paraguay duelling is legal just as long as both parties are registered blood donors.
– In Milan, Italy, there is still a law that requires citizens to smile at all times or risk a hefty fine. The only exceptions are visiting hospitals and funerals.
– In Switzerland every citizen is required by law to have access to a bomb shelter.
– In Burma it is illegal to get internet access. If a person is found in possession of a modem he can be imprisoned.
– In Bangladesh it is against the law for schoolchildren to cheat at school exams. Pupils as young as 15 can be imprisoned for this.
– Until 1984 Belgians were made to choose their children’s names from a list of 1500 drawn up in the days of Napoleon.
– In Romania, in 1935, Mickey Mouse was banned because the authorities thought that the sight of a 10ft high rodent on screen would terrify the nation’s children.
– Donald Duck comics were once banned in Finland because he never wore pants.
– Belgium is the only country that has never imposed censorship on adult films.
– Karate films were banned in Iraq in 1979.
– In Indiana, USA, during the 1950’s, all Robin Hood films were banned because authorities thought that robbing the rich to give to the poor was an act of communism.
– In Iceland it was once against the law to own a pet dog.
– The bloodhound is the only animal in the world whose evidence is admissable in court.
– In Basle, Switzerland, in 1471, a cockerel was found guilty in a court of law for laying an egg “In defiance of natural law”. The bird was then burnt at the stake as a “Devil in disguise”.
– In Stelvio, Italy, in 1519, a court issued a warrant for the arrest of a gang of moles that had severely damaged crops. The moles were sumoned to court but when they failed to appear they were sentenced to exile.
– In South Bend, Indiana, USA, a monkey was once found guilty of smoking a cigarette.
– In Munster, in 1670, the courts banished a plague of fleas from the city, prohibiting them from returning for ten years.
– In Seville, Spain, in 1983, an alsatian dog was arrested for snatching handbags from shoppers.
– Judge J.H. Logan from California, USA, created the Loganberry fruit. He crossed a wild blackberry with a cultivated raspberry and came up with his own fruit.
– In ancient Sparta men were required by law to eat at least two pounds of meat every day. This was supposed to make them brave.
– In Turkey, during the 16th and 17th centuries, it was illegal to drink coffee and anyone caught doing so was sentenced to death.
– In Venice all gondolas have to be painted black unless they belong to a high ranking official.
– In England, in 1865, a law was passed stating that any self propelled carriage on an English highway had to have a crew of three, one of whom had to walk in front of the carriage with a red flag to warn horse drawn vehicles of it’s approach.
– In Rome, 2,000 years ago, Julius Caesar banned chariots from the centre of Rome to ease congestion.
– In London, England, there is still a law that states London Taxi cabs must carry a bale of hay at all times.
– In Bermuda, up until 1948, all private cars were banned.
– At one time it was against the law to slam car doors in Switzerland.
– In Britain, in 1888, a law was passed which stated that every cyclist had to constantly ring the bell on his bicycle non-stop while the machine was moving.
– In Singapore it is illegal for a person to walk around the house naked and not flushing the toilet. Also a person can be executed if they are found in possession of more than 200g of cannabis resin. Oral sex is banned unless it is used only during foreplay and if a person is caught littering the streets he is forced to make an appearance on TV with a bib around his neck saying “I’m a litterer.”
– In Birmingham, England, it is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex on church steps after sundwon.
– In Iowa, USA, it is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrants.
– In Denmark it is not illegal for a convicted prisoner to escape from prison. If the escapee is caught he only serves the rest of his sentence.
– In Denmark it is illegal to start your car without first checking to see if there are any children asleep underneath it.
– In Thailand it is illegal to step on a banknote, leave your house without wearing underwear and if you drop a piece of bubblegum on the pavement you can be fined $600.
– In Thailand all cinema goers must stand up during the National Anthem before a film starts.
– In Switzerland it is against the law for men to urinate standing up after 10pm which is the same time that it is illegal to flush the toilet.
– In Canada, by law, 1 out of every 5 songs on the radio must be sung by a Canadian and in British Columbia it is illegal to kill a Sasquatch or Bigfoot if one is ever found.
– In Alberta a released convict is entitled to a gun and a horse to ride out of town on.
– In London, England, it is illegal to use a camera tripod, throw a stick for your dog or use an offensive powder like pepper on your jacket potato in any park.
– In London, England, wife beating is legal just as long as it is not after 9pm and it doesn’t disturb the neighbours.
– In London, England, it is illegal to impersonate a Chelsea pensioner which once carried the death sentence in the 19th century.
– In Lebanon men are allowed to have sex with any other animal just as long as it is a female. If a man is caught having sex with a male animal then the penalty is death.
– Non-Christians have been banned from being within 20 metres of churches in Rovato, Italy. The move, instigated by the local government, has angered police because a major highway passes within 15 metres of one of the churches. Officers claim that they cannot be expected to stop motorists and demand to see a Baptism Certificate.
– North Carolina has a law to ban people from swearing in front of cadavers. The law also sets out guidelines transporting the recently deceased after one funeral firm was caught piling stiffs onto the back of a pick-up truck. It outlaws ‘profanity, indecent or obscene language in the presence of a dead human body’ making it technically illegal to say the ‘f’ word in front of a hearse!
– In Minnesota, USA, it is still against the law to hang male and female underwear together on the same washing line.
– In Indiana, USA, in the 1950’s anything to do with Robin Hood was banned on the grounds that robbing from from the rich to give to the poor was a communist act!
– In England, in 1837, a law was passed that entitled a woman to bite off a man’s nose if he kissed her against her will!
– The Egyptian government banned male belly-dancing in 1837 because of the enthusiastic riots that it caused.
– In Arizona, USA, it is illegal to hunt camels.
– In California, USA, in 1986, Judge Samuel King became so annoyed that jurors were absent from his court because of heavy rain that he issued a decree which stated “I hereby order that it cease raining by Tuesday.”
Amazingly it stopped raining on Tuesday and California suffered a 5 year drought.
In 1991 the judge then decreed “Rain shall fall in California beginning February 27th.” Later that day California had the heaviest rainfall in ten years.
– In Alexandria, Minneapolis, USA, it is against the law for a man to make love to a woman with the smell of sardines on his breath.